The dorm hallways were strewn with red-faced underage students acting as if they’d never encountered a drink before in their life.Walking into the main room, I was affronted by the blasting sounds of contemporary hip-hop and sight of grinding recent high school graduates. His roommate answered his cell phone and explained that he’d already passed out.Why talk about explosive credit card debt when there are secret drum circles to attend?It’s gratifying to introduce a date to such underground haunts as the upstairs at Notsuoh and readings of anarchist texts at Sedition.
Or you can play one of my favorite youth pastimes, “Spot the Rice Student” at Cafe Brasil (hint: watch for ill-fitting sweatshirts and banter about biochemistry professors).
Don’t: Attend on-campus parties I accepted an invitation from Jon to take part in an '80's-theme party at his school, and quickly went to work compiling the perfect getup and rehearsing MJ videos on You Tube.
Arriving on campus, I immediately was accosted by a security guard taking issue with my Vitamin Water bottle I’d halved with Ketel 1.
This wasn’t a purposeful experiment to produce column fodder (although I’m not above such antics), but merely happenstance.
And now – in time for the college tradition of the Turkey-drop, it appears that this period has passed.
After all, the prospect of a life spent endlessly pining for pretty young things is fairly unsettling.