I am really at cross roads as to what to do about this!I firmly believed in marriage but it has only broken my heart Hi Sara, I am so sorry for what you are going through and just wanted you to know that I am going through almost exact same thing, except we have only been married two years!However, the problem is when that distance is so large that the one who needs more attention ends up feeling stranded in their own marriage. And in the end, long term wise - you end up feeling indifferent and that is the opposite of love.I see a lot of articles on how to "attract the distant partner" but I rarely see the opposite, directed at the distancing partner and the long term, negative impacts on the spouse who needs a more connection and a marriage that is more than "just roommates".Are you exercising, eating well, and taking good care of yourself? Praise the specifics (“You were so funny at the party last night”) and dial down the criticism.Even the best marriages will get stuck in too much distance or too much intensity.
This is not have I envisioned my married life to be. I feel for you my live in partner of 5 years has distanced by leaving. He has always been kind loving and only ever wanted to be around me. Trying to make sense of his head with no emotions or feelings for anything. I am a believer on trying to sort out issues together.
I find that in trying to not pursue him, I end up feeling indifferent towards him.
I do feel much calmer over all, and have enjoyed renewing old friendships and finding other things to do without him, but now I feel like I don't need him.
I do not necessarily want a divorce, but I feel like my marriage is a farce, and our relationship a mere shell of what it used to be.
In any couple there is normally one who is a bit more distant than the other.